Moment of Reflection

Updated: Mar 27, 2021

Sometimes I think as writers, at least I know I do, that we spend so much time in our heads that we often miss the strides we’ve made. I think as the weeks have rolled on I’ve unintentionally been putting myself in a place where the results aren’t meeting my expectations or worse, aren’t meeting the expectations I think others have set. I feel like the latter is closer to imagined than fact. In the end, it took a friend reminding me to breathe, to clear the fog.

So I stop, breathe, and look behind me. In that moment, I realized I haven’t been doing this long. What I mean is that the years of writing and creating that i've done were training. They were a time of preparation and this past year is the marathon. The race is all about endurance.

Before a year ago, I didn’t have social media, a website or anything. Before a year ago, I had no clue what it took. I learn more every day, grow a little bit by bit and even if I trip, I still get back up. I just have to remember to breathe.

I think the hardest part is that it’s easy to burn yourself out when your expectations grow so high. You want the thing you’re pursuing so badly that you expend all your energy trying to get there. You forget to pace yourself and eventually collapse.

The tweets, posts, tags, and messages become overwhelming. Soon after, your writing begins to suffer. The thing is that I feel like we often forget is that as long we maintain a level of consistency in what we do, we will find what we are looking for. Not everyone has the same time table and you know what, that’s perfectly okay.

It doesn’t mean you should slack off. It just means that you should operate as a level in which you can manage your dreams within the reality of where you are at. Do what you can do and do it well. Don’t wear yourself out, you’ll only end up doing it badly.

There are moments I find myself thinking: Oh, I didn’t post anything yesterday, or, I forgot to respond to this person, or, I only made one blog post this week.

Again, I have to remind myself to simply breathe. I’m running a marathon, not a race. Just do what you can. Followers come and go, but real supporters will keep with you. (Abi Pearson reminded me of that this week. Her twitter account is @Arpearson2).

Sometimes it often feels so unfair that you have to fight so hard. On the other hand, I honestly believe that if we didn’t, then we wouldn’t appreciate everything we have achieved nearly as much. The thing we strove so hard for would lose its meaning.

So we fight and push. We strain to reach for what is in front of us. When it slips between our fingers, just stop, take a moment and once again breathe. Don't let that moment stop you.

In closing, I just want to say whether you’ve been writing for a few months or a few years, keep running your marathon. Your work is valuable and you will find the person to help you move forward.

For this week I’d like to do a shout out to a few of my twitter friends for being so amazingly supportive of my nonsense. Jaimie Rutley @bionicanadian, Aria Blake @ariablakeoffici, Jess Brister @JMbrister, Elizabeth @poetkisses, Nadine Kimmage @nadkim, Kathryn @blade_kathryn, Stephanie Lewis @slewislynn, Michelle Burden @michburden13. I really appreciate you all of you.

Have a beautiful weekend everyone. Thank you for reading. If you like this post and other posts on my blog please #subscribe. It helps me out a lot.


Matt Brown

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